It makes you blind, it does you in;
it makes you think you’re pretty tough.
It makes you prone to crime and sin;
it makes you say things off the cuff.
It’s very small and made of glass,
and grossly over-advertised.
It turns a genius to an ass,
and makes a fool think he is wise.
It could make you regret your birth,
or turn cartwheels in your best suit.
It costs a lot more than it’s worth –
and yet there is no substitute.
They keep it on a higher shelf,
the older and more pure it grows.
It has no color in itself,
but it can make you see rainbows.
You can find it on the Bowery,
or you can find it at Elaine’s.
It makes your words more flowery.
It makes the sun shine, makes it rain.
You just get out what they put in,
and they never put in enough.
Love is like a bottle of gin,
but a bottle of gin is not like love.
– Magnetic Fields, “Love Is Like a Bottle of Gin”
Also, the best Valentine’s Day comic ever.